hello everybody,
feeling down today. dunnoe why though, but feel very confused, not sure what caused this confusion too... if only i could run into somewhere warm and let my tears fall...
today was a bad day, dominated by the mask of me... sometimes i just want him to go away... but seems like its very hard for it to leave. its almost like me shadow... gotta suppress it.
late for school today, bad start.
nuthing much happened later on.. march pass. then the carnival started. jie you shud hav came! was kinda hot though... but its okie, there is still next year. after a while, chen tong and i left the crowded scene to have breakfast at hcjc, well we were not supposed to do that but the canteen wasnt open. bleh..
when we came back, wen bo told me to sell nuts, which was our item for the carnival. he gave me 6 rolls (kacang putih). lets see.. the price was supposed to be a dollar each. but in the end, i sold 2 for a dollar, 1 for 50 cents, and gave 2 away.. wait, that only adds up to five. oops, cant remember where the last one went to.
the climax of the carnival was the performances. the bands were okay. but the best as a sec 4 guy. his vocals were very good, he sang a few songs by FIR. yes, FIR, if you dint see him, you wud think it was a
girl. seriously.

and i must thank 2c for all the ice cream. especially the canoeists. thanks chuan yi, weets and timo! i had a wonderful time at your stall. well,actually everyone did.

for lunch, chen tong, woon yang and i went to coronation plaza to have golden rooster (the name of the stall). woon yang had a craving for lemon chicken rice just now and wanted to go there. chen tong and i thought of a good idea.... terms... woon yang had to give us each a treat of 1 dollar then we wud go. we got it! at first i thought we were joking. anyway, thanks woon yang! later we went back to skool to do robotics stuff, went pass 7-eleven to get drinks. as usual, i was
slacking in the bot room XP...

later i went home, and slept on the bus on the journey back home.. zzz... tired.

then i felt really low, i dint noe why but yup, need company. so i called clarissa, and we had a good chat. then we came across the topics of our true personality and different personae that all of us have. these masks cover all your sadness and pain. they make you live in a state of self-denial. not many people really think these deep. but if you try to remember, when was your last time using a different mask? i
guess its not long ago.. i also use masks to cover up everything... its only when talking to a few people then i could truly throw my bad mask away, and just be myself. sometimes, i really hate this mask of mine, it is sadistic and sarcastic and hurt others a lot,and many other things you can think of. GO AWAY bad freak! :'( you make me cry.

^ the more you use masks, the true you will slowly fade away, and you will become your mask itself...

living in sadness and lone,
~matt